Story Time
by Kookie-chan
Summary: As boredom ensues, The Volturi decides to tell stories about things. Chaos happens. Chapter Four, for Halloween, Alice recreates the Cullen's house into a maze, part 2.
1. Simple Fairytale

**Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight. **

_The story that Aro is telling will be in italics. _

**Chapter 1 – Simple Fairytale **

The Volturi walks onto the set, wearing their same black cloaks. Seeming as they were floating as they walk, their footsteps barley audible. The group consisted of Aro, Marcus, Caius, Jane and Alec. They seated themselves in chairs, Aro holding a book in his hand. Jane looked annoyed, Alec calm, Marcus rather bored, Caius with a partly interested expression, and Aro smiling in a weird way.

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls of all ages, welcome." Aro said his voice covered with thick honey.

"… You sound like a pedophile." Caius replied. Alec howled with laughter and Jane jabbed him sharply in the ribs.

Aro ignored that. "Let's see what story we have today…" He was about to open the book when-

"WAIT!!" Emmett cried and stomped into the set. He replaced the book with a different one and left.

The Volturi stared. "Err, okay... Let's begin!"

_In a very far land from here, there lived a beautiful princess. Lots of men had fallen head over heels for her, but she never had returned their feelings. Her name was Princess Rosalie. Her mother and father desperately wanted her to find a prince, a future king of the kingdom. Rosalie obliged but none of the suitors was her cup of tea. _

"_Rosalie, you are getting old. Find a prince soon, or else you'll be too old to marry." Her mother scolded. _

"_Mother, I am trying my best. None of them seem to fit my taste." Rosalie replied, while looking out the window, hoping for her prince to arrive. _

"You know, this sounds really corny." Jane interrupted.

"Deal with it." Rosalie snapped her voice in the background.

_Princess Rosalie's parents, very impatient and getting grumpy, decided to hold a ball. There, they decided that she would have to find someone. They invited every man, from the far side of the forest to the very ends of the kingdom they reined over. Just as long the men were not in jail and would take their precious daughter hostage. The ball was going to be held in a few days from now but guests from everywhere in the kingdom was appearing already._

_Rosalie sat on the throne, watching the guests show up and stare at her admiringly. It was quite boring. She would've rather watched a bird swallowing a frog whole or something. These suitors, they were all the same. They were only interested in taking hold of the throne, selfish for themselves. They didn't really care about her, even if they did; it was because she was the king and queen's daughter, not their lover. _

"_Prince Emmett." The announcer guy announced. Rosalie looked around, there was no one there except for the prince whose face she couldn't see because of he was still inside the carriage. She stuck out her tongue and blew. It made a farting like sound. Laughter boomed from the carriage. Rosalie looked up; there was the prince that had actually got her interested in the past hour. He was rather muscular and large, but with a good sense of humor. He walked up the steps, with a smile on his face. _

_He reached out his hand. "Emmett, nice to meet you Rosalie." She felt surprised; he treated her like a friend, rather than a princess like how the other suitors did. She took his hand, shaking it with a slight smile on her face. So far, this prince was rather interesting to her taste. "Well see you later." Their hands parted and he bowed a bit then walked away. Rosalie watched him as he left, she found him attractive. _

_--_

_It was the dinner. All the suitors were all stuck-up to the king and queen, trying their best to please them. However, there was one suitor who was not so stuck-up; he hung around the dinner table until he decided to engage the king and queen in a conversation about frogs. That certain suitor was Emmett. During the whole dinner Rosalie was staring at him every now and then. Not wanting to cause too much of attention at that. Unfortunately, one of the suitors, named Royce had found that despicable. He decided to talk to 'his' princess after the dinner. _

_Rosalie was about to stand up and go over to talk to Emmett as everyone rose from the table but Royce blocked her path. He looked like he was expecting something. "Hello, I'm Royce. Princess Rosalie, can I please have a moment?" Rosalie silently sighed and nodded. "Thank you." He led her out to the back garden. Even though the candles were on, the two were dimly seen in the dark. Royce sat down on a cool stone bench, he gestured to the empty seat next to him. She sat down, despite the reluctant of her instincts. "Princess, I see that you take a certain interest to a prince. It may be selfish of me to ask but can you consider the other suitors? The main reason why the king and queen held this was because you could meet many suitors not just pay attention to one." Rosalie knew that Royce wanted her to pay more attention to him than she did to Emmett. _

"_I-" Rosalie began but was interrupted as Royce tried to kiss her, she struggled against him. But before he could force himself onto her, she felt a hand wrap around her waist protectively, pulling her back and another smashing a pie into Royce's face. _

"_What the-" Royce said, wiping the cream off of his face. Rosalie looked up into the face of her prince, it was Emmett. And he looked really pissed. _

"_You're in a hell of trouble buddy. Trying to harass the princess, eh?" Emmett said suggestively, a threatening tone in his voice. Royce had no time to reply has Emmett released his grip on Rosalie and flung him into the water fountain. _

"Damn, Emmett can really kick ass." Alec said, looking to the side of the set and looking like he wanted to move farther away from it.

A whistle was heard from the background. "Woo!!" There was only one person who that could come from, Emmett.

"Language." Esme reminded from somewhere in the studio.

"_Emmett?" Rosalie asked with a questioned look. _

_Emmett gave her a reassuring one. "I saw you being dragged off to your doom and decided to follow. Then I decided to kick the dragon's ass." He laughed. "Lets go back. I'm going to ask your hand in marriage, that is, you disagree." He looked at her seriously. _

"_I agree." Rosalie smiled and pulled Emmett into a surprising kiss. _

"That was… weird." Marcus said, blinking. A chair was thrown across the set and directly hitting his head. "Ow."

"I want POP TARTS!!" Jane screamed.

"Shut up Jane." Felix said, popping out of nowhere, trying to close Jane's mouth.

"Well that concludes today's story. See you next time!" Aro said happily, ignoring the chaos behind him as the studio began to burn to the ground while waving to the camera.

--

A/N: I think this was supposed to be like Sleeping Beauty in Rosalie's and Emmett's version but this is all I can come up with. Maybe the next one will be Bella and Edward's whacky version of the three little pigs? Or maybe an Alice and Jasper one… Please review, thanks. :)


	2. Little Storm

**Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight. **

_The story that Marcus is telling will be in italics. _

**Chapter 2 – Little Storm **

Seconds tick by as the camera adjusts to the light, the Volturi moves onto the set. The group still consisted of Aro, Marcus, Caius, Jane and Alec. Aro had another book in his hand, this time with an amused gleam in his eyes. Jane stopped, causing Alec to slam into her. She turned, in slow motion, to the camera and scowled at it. Jane glared at it as if she wanted to rip it to shreds. So she did. In slow motion, Jane pounced at the camera and all went black. That is until they got a new camera a few days later.

"Jane, you must not do that ever again." Aro scolded, as if he was an ageing mother. Alec stood next to him, holding a sign that read _'Sexually Lustful Leader of Volturi' _and an arrow that pointed at Aro.

"Tell the readers what story you are telling this time." Marcus said, his eyes staring blankly at the camera.

"Well, today's story is going to be about-"Aro began but was interrupted.

"Bella, Edward, and Jacob and about their sex lives!!" Caius yelled, breaking from his thoughts. A shoe was thrown at him, hitting him directly behind the head, amazingly, knocking him out cold.

"No, no. It is about Bella, Edward, and the shape shifter though." The author could've sworn she saw Aro's eyes widen with excitement for a split second.

"Jane, do you want to know a secret?" Alec asked his sister, she nodded eagerly. "Aro is a pedophile, that's why he likes to touch so much." Jane and Alec bombed the studio with laughter.

"That is not why I need to touch!" Aro screamed, increasing the sibling's laughter. A low growl rippled from his throat before he pounced, the siblings' laughter exploding.

The book landed in Marcus's lap. He looked at it. "Let's begin."

_It was a cold and rainy day at the Cullen's house. Thunder boomed outside as the wind blew not too hard. The Cullens were comfortably doing whatever they liked to do without leaving the house along with Bella, due to the storm accruing outside. Alice was on the computer, going on countless shopping websites online. Jasper looking through a magazine. Emmett sitting on the family room couch, playing a new video game he had gotten. Rosalie sat on the other couch, watching Emmett play while giving herself a manicure. Edward and Bella sitting in the dining room, playing their infamous game of poker. Carlisle and Esme watching a movie upstairs in their room. Everything was nice… For now that is. _

"_Bella, I give up." Edward said, sighing as he placed his cards down on the table. _

"_That was fun." Bella replied, smiling as she placed her cards down on the table also. Edward reached for the cards to put them back into a deck. They had been playing for a while. Suddenly, a loud exploding noise was heard from outside. Bella twitched, not expecting the noise but Edward had fallen into a defensive crouch until he realized it was just the storm. _

"_Bella, calm down, it's just the storm." Edward wrapped his arms around Bella's shoulders, breathing in her scent. _

"_I'm not so sure about that." Alice hollered from the family room. _

"_What do you mean Alice?" Bella questioned as she stepped into the family room with Edward following close behind. _

"_I had a vision." Alice turned to them and winked. "You're in for a surprise." _

_There was a rumble from upstairs, like someone being tackled. The sound of quick vampire language hushed whispers, giggles and laughs. Silence. "I don't know if that's the storm." Emmett said, laughing. Rosalie turned, settling herself next to her mate. Suddenly, the TV images and lights blinked off and on then completely shutting off. _

"_NOOOO!!" Alice screamed, shaking the computer's monitor as if she was on a sugar rush. "I was about to buy that!!" _

"_I can't see!!" Jasper said, walking around in the dark, waving his arms around. _

"_Jasper, we have night vision. Just open your eyes." Rosalie said, rolling her eyes. _

"_Oh yeah, right." Jasper blinked. "Thanks." _

_Meanwhile Edward had a bit of trouble guiding Bella to a chair in the dark. "No, Bella go to your left." She hit the table. "Sorry. Almost there." She tripped over Carlisle's cat. "Carlisle put your cat somewhere else!" Feeling impatient, Edward picked Bella up and placed her in a chair. "There." _

"_Belllaaaaa." A ghost like voice echoed through the house. "Let me innnnn." The doorbell and a knock came from outside. _

"_Don't let the pizza man in Bella!" Alice said. "He'll steal your soul!" She let out a long string of hyper giggles. _

"_What the helll? I don't eat pizzaaa. It's me Jacobbb." _

"_Oh." Bella replied and opened the door. A damp Jacob stepped in, flicking on the lights. _

"_Bella, you're not supposed to let the wolf in." Edward said, stepping in between her and Jacob. _

"_Ha ha, what a cute little kitty." Ignoring Edward, Jacob bent down to poke Carlisle's orange kitty. Wordlessly, Edward opened the door and shoved Jacob outside, bolting the door down. _

"_Edward!" Bella protested, trying to unbolt the door. _

"_It's not how the story goes Bella; you are not supposed to let him in." Edward replied. However Bella ignored this, opening the back door and pulling Jacob in. "Darn… I forgot the back door." _

_At that exact moment, Carlisle and Esme appeared. Carlisle noticed that Jacob was playing with his kitty. His kitty. It was his, not Jacob's. HIS KITTY. Esme walked over to Alice, helping Jasper to calm her down from the sugar. Silently, Carlisle went over to the closet, and removed a lidless cardboard box from it. Seating himself next to Jacob, he took his orange kitty, Fuzzies from Jacob's arms and gave Jacob a brown kitty. _

"_They. Are. So. Cute." Jacob said, playing with his kitty. "I'll name you Muffin!" This brought the attention of Edward, Jasper, and Emmett. Edward's grey kitty was named Bells, Jasper's white kitty was named Lizzy and Emmett's black kitty was named Candy. _

"_Emmett!!" Carlisle snapped. Emmett was halfway of putting his kitty into his mouth. _

"_Sorry." Emmett mumbled and played with his kitty. _

_Esme, Alice, and Bella sat in the corner sighing. "Kitties…" _

"Wow, kitties." Jane said, peering at the book behind Marcus. After the fight with the Volturi leader and the Volturi guard, they had ended up sitting in the corner for a time out by Caius.

"Hey, isn't that Candy?" Alec asked, pointing toward the cute black kitty in front of them.

"Cute…" Aro mumbled as he poked at it.

"MINEEE!!" Emmett roared before tackling Aro to the ground.

"That wraps up today's story. See you next time!" Marcus said, almost sounding not apathetic.

--

A/N: I feel like I wrote this almost randomly… And I need a better summary, does anyone have any suggestions? I'm bad at summaries… Thanks for reviews, favorite, and alerts! Please review, thanks. :D


	3. Tricky Tricks by the Pixie Part 1

Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight

**Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight. **  
_The story that Jane is telling will be in italics._  
**Chapter 3 – Tricky Tricks by the Pixie Part 1  
**Blink, blink. The high flash turned low as it was getting used to the light. However, the scenery in front of you was quite odd. Aro, Marcus, Caius, Jane and Alec were jumping on trampolines. That is, until Alec stood his foot out and tripped Marcus for no reason. They both fell to the ground, wrestling. Jane gave one last jump and landed on her trampoline, having a giggling fit.

"This is not the time to have a wrestling match; it is not a boxing ring." Aro said, trying to pull them apart.

"Yeah it is." Caius said. The Volturi looked around, Caius was right. They were standing in the middle of a boxing ring.

"Oh crap." All chaos began; I hope you readers could imagine what happened. When they were done, their cloaks were ripped and purple circles appeared at their eyes, this time not because they were thirsty.

"Lets see…" Jane opened the book lazily and began reading.

_Halloween. __**Halloween. **__Hallow- __The author was just knocked down by one of the Twilight characters, to stop saying Halloween in different fonts with italics and should just get on with the story. Today was Halloween, a day where children run around like wild monkeys for candy, and scary costumes. Yes, scary costumes. Luckily, today was a little cloudy but not sunny. Just the perfect weather. As you look closer, there on the Cullen's door steps, was a jack-o-lantern. Where the Cullens celebrating Halloween too? Of course they were they didn't want to miss out on the fun. _

_Ding dong. Bella waited as she pressed the door bell. Only a few seconds later, she was welcomed in by Edward, who was dressed up as a magician. He had an amused smile on his face, gesturing for her to enter. _

"_Real scary Bella." Edward said sarcastically. Bella was dressed up as a ghost, wearing a white sheet with holes in it. Bella slowly raised a hand, jabbing him in the chest. However, Edward pulled Bella closer, embracing her with his arms around her shoulder. "I fell for a ghost, a very pretty one though." He chuckled. "Alice will get you into another costume, you know that right?" _

"_I know." Bella replied before standing on her toes and giving him a kiss. After their little scene was done, they went into the living room, to see what other costumes the rest of the Cullens had on. Bella's lips turned into a smile, slightly amused by the costumes. Emmett was dressed up as Frankenstein. And guess what, Rosalie was dressed up as Frankenstein's wife. Even though Rosalie looked a little silly, she still made the costume look amazing with the white and black wig and the red dress... Along with Emmett's green face with something that looked like screws on top of his ears and stitches around his head, with a brown jacket and ripped jeans. Carlisle was dressed up as an angel, in white however. The author will let the readers visualize that, as they have their own amazing imagination. Esme was a match, she wore almost the same angel, except it was black and it looked a lot like Carlisle's clothes than her own. The odd thing was that Alice and Jasper weren't around. Where were they?_

"Bella!" A pixie called as she danced down the stairs followed by a mummy. The pixie was actually Alice; she was dressed up in a purple witch costume. With a matching purple hat, some slight glitter, and a cute dress to go along with her shoes. Jasper was mostly covered in mummy wrappings, the only parts not covered was his eyes, hair, and mouth. "Let's get you in a better costume!" Alice took Bella by the hand, dragging her up the stairs with her heels dragging.

"Help meeeee." Bella's plea for help soon faded into the background.

"What?" Jasper asked as he caught everyone staring at him. Edward shrugged it off and went to play on his piano. Jasper plopped down on a chair, turning on the computer, playing the games it provided. Emmett turned back to the TV, widely playing with his XBOX. Rosalie continued to paint her nails while stealing glances at the XBOX, almost hoping to break it someday for a certain reason. Esme and Carlisle were whispering to each other in the corner, entwining their fingers together.

"Oh crap."

It hurt a bit. Having someone curl iron your hair a bit too roughly then doing your makeup. Bella couldn't help but had to sit on the seat of Alice's bathroom as Alice decorated her. Almost like a Bella Barbie doll. But at the same time it also felt pleasant, having the company of someone and to talk to.

"Bella, you are going to look so beautiful!" Alice said as she stepped back to look at Bella.

"Alice, you don't have to do this." Bella said, blushing.

Alice looked at Bella sternly. "I want to. Now here, try these on." She tossed Bella a black magician black hat, a blue shirt that looked a lot like Edward's, a black thin vest, black jeans, and black high heels. Shutting the door and exiting into her bedroom, Alice lashed out a walkie talkie from out of nowhere.

"Jasper!" Alice whispered into the walkie talkie. "Can you read me?"

"Loud and clear." Jasper replied on the other side.

"Activate the maze."

"Shoot! Edward heard us! Plan _exposed__."_

Everyone turned their heads toward Edward, wondering why he looked a little alarmed and defensive. He was in a half crouch, standing next to Jasper. Almost child-like, Jasper peered up at Edward with a scared expression. He let out a long shriek of terror before calling Alice. Upon hearing the scream and her name being called, Alice sprinted down the stairs with a remote in hand.

Growling at Edward who was holding Jasper up by the mummy bandages which amazingly hadn't ripped yet "Drop Jasper or else I'll press the button."

Edward narrowed his eyes. "You wouldn't dare."

"I would." Edward gave a shrug before dropping Jasper. He glanced up at the stairs as Bella was walking down the steps. Before he could move a millimeter towards his love, Alice pressed the red button. An earthquake erupted beneath the Cullen's mansion.

"T-this-s is-s so-o c-cool!" Emmett said as he sat on a ball, bouncing up and down as the floor shook. Rosalie shook her head and sighed.

"What's going on?" Esme asked as Edward caught Bella from falling and Carlisle wrapping his arm around her waist.

"A game." Alice replied, smiling. "Once I press the green button, the floor will disappear beneath us and we will all fall into a maze. Good luck finding your way out." She winked and pressed the green button. 

_Alice was right, the floor disappeared beneath their feet as they let out screams when they fell._

Sprawled out on the living room couch was Charlie. He was watching sports as he ate pizza. Well, he was finished with the pizza about ten minutes ago when Jasper shrieked. Sitting back up, Charlie shook his head. He was hearing a voice, that wasn't normal. He blinked, he had just heard Bella and the Cullens scream, this time every one of the Cullens.

"Bella? Edward?" Charlie called out. Chuckling nervously, he shook his head. "I'm just imagining things…"

Rosalie POV  
I groaned. Since when did Alice's and Edward's schemes get bigger? And when I mean bigger, I mean HUGE. Alice had just collapsed the whole house's floor, sending us into some crazed game of maze for Halloween. Ugh, I need to get out of the house more often. And taking that XBOX away from Emmett. He and I spending more time together… My lips curved into a smile as I continued to daydream.

"Hey babe." I snapped my eyes open. That voice felt different, and I didn't like it one bit. Sitting up I saw that I was in a bed. With Newton. I glared daggers at Newton, glowering and growling. "Sexy." Even the tone of his voice, I hated that. He leaned in to kiss me; I raised my fist to his face. Without needing my vampire super strength, his face was rammed into my fist by his own fault. Serves him right, asshole. "What you doin' babe? I want you." What kind of sick joke was this? Wordlessly I kicked him off the bed and onto the carpeted floor. Picking him up by his foot, I threw him out the window. As simple as that.

"Stupid maze…" I mumbled as I walked out of the room into the hall of many passages, trying to find my way out.

Emmett POV  
Since when had my body hurt this much? It must've been some fall that Alice put us through. Standing up and stretching, I looked around. It looked a bit like the living room of our house. Except that it was like the first time we moved in, no furniture except a couch and a TV with an XBOX. An XBOX. Plugged into the wall and ready to play with games… Hm… I looked around, no one was here. Good.

"Aha! Thanks Alice!" I shouted, landing on the couch after a leap and began to play. The screen lit up with lights and the buttons on the remote connected to the video game console began clicking wildly. Too bad I didn't notice the approaching footsteps behind me. Someone grabbed my remote and took it away from me, bad idea. I turned, growling, half expecting to see Rosalie while half expecting to see Carlisle. Instead, I saw Edward. Dang, he was really angry too, like he was going to explode.

"Daddie?" I cried out, almost in tears like a child. "Daddie Edward?"

"Emmett!" Edward spoke. Emmett cringed. There was an impact. "You will have to stop playing video games for the rest of the day. Already you have spent… two hundred thousand dollars!" Bending down and scooping up the TV, XBOX, and its games, Edward dumped it off in the closet in the corner, locking it before disappearing.

"Mean Edward." I whined, stomping to find a way out of this stupid place.  
_--  
__Esme POV  
She was in big trouble. Alice. I don't mean just grounding her or something. I would need to talk to Carlisle, planning to take away the credit cards away for a week or two. I mean like she somehow had collapsed the whole house's floor! Sighing I opened my eyes. I was in a room. Carlisle and my room actually. For some reason I felt lazy, did vampires ever feel like that? I thought we didn't… Turning over, I came face to face to my husband. He was smiling at me like nothing had ever happened, a sweet smile._

Unfortunately the façade broke when he opened his mouth and began singing 7 Things (Guys don't have to do) – Miley Cyrus, Spoof. "Its time for me to say this, addressing all you guys. Except for all the drag queens, who deserve a nobel prize. But the straight guys, they don't realize, what we go through everyday, and it's a lot. Now its time for all us females to remind you, just in case, you all forgot. The 7 things guys don't have to do:  
Shave legs  
Give birth  
Aunt Flow  
Wear Skirts  
Wax Armpits  
Hey it hurts!  
Wear pantyhose  
And paint your toes too  
High heels  
Pluck brows  
Skip meals  
Count pounds  
Some girls have to carry heavy mounds  
We're way past seven now  
But I'll keep going anyhow  
Uncomfy thongs  
Tight bras  
Tampons  
Blow our money on beauty salons  
Flat iron burns  
And health concerns from hair dye fumes."

I stopped listening to what Carlisle was singing. I stared at him, baffled. Sure most girls would be amazed if their love sang to them in a romantic way, but I wasn't sure if this was really romantic… Not really. Silently I stood up, leaving my husband to sing to himself as I left the room.  
--  
"Ah, sorry readers but we need to take a break." Aro said, standing up and stretching.

"Dude, my butt really hurts." Demetri said, rubbing his behind. Aro turned away from the scene as Jane and Alec bursted into laughter.

"This story will be continued next time." Aro marched out of the studio, grumbling about how he wasn't paid enough to do this job instead of making schemes to take over the world.

"You'll never take over the world!"

A/N: **No offense intended in this chapter**. Don't hurt me D: I decided to cut this chapter because I think together the chapter would be really long. That and I think it might be past Halloween if I try to post the chapter together so I'm splitting it in two to make it a bit easier. And about New Moon as Snow White, I see some but its kinda confusing… But I'll think about it (: Review and you get Edward-Made Muffins!

P.S. Augh, something's wrong with the Microsoft Word or fanfiction. It gets all messed up if I try to edit it after I upload at the Documents place. Sorry if it switches or something.


	4. Tricky Tricks by the Pixie Part 2

Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight

**Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight. **  
_The story that Jane is telling will be in italics._  
**Chapter 4 – Tricky Tricks by the Pixie Part 2 **

---------------

_Edward POV  
Ah, I felt like I was in heaven, spending time with Bella. I assumed that it would be a couple hours before everyone found their way out of the maze. With my mind reading abilities, I already knew how to get out of the maze. Here I am, sitting and having a sweet time with Bella while hearing everyone's thoughts. I couldn't help but to let curiosity take over, I wondered how everyone was doing. Letting out a sigh of relief, I turned to Bella and was about to give her a kiss when -_

"Cullen?" I twitched at the sound of that voice. "BLODDY HELL!" Augh, since when had Newton appeared? Forcing my eyes open I saw that it was him, right in front of me. Holy crap. He was looking like Bella, except for his face… And I don't want to know what was at his chest. Growling, I pulled Newton up by his collar. Two melons rolled out of his shirt and onto the floor. What in the world?

"What did you do with Bella?" I said, threateningly. Newton's eyes shone with fear.

"I-I don't know! I was just with Rosalie then she threw me out the window!" Disgusting. Ripping the window open, I threw him out and made sure that he was out of the Cullen residence. Ruffling my slightly messy hair, I walked out of the room and onto the maze in hopes of finding Bella.

Bella POV  
"Edward?" I called out to nothingness. Squinting my eyes a little, I looked around. It was dark and hard to see through. Stamping my foot in frustration as I felt my way around, I really need to stop that. So far, I believe that I was in a room. Reaching to the center of the room, I felt it. It was a couch and someone was occupying it. I immediately backed up; Alice wouldn't put anyone dangerous in here right? Of course she wouldn't, she knows that… "Who's there?" My voice hadn't had much courage as I had wanted it to. A light flicked on, the whole room lit up. It took for a few seconds for my eyes to adjust to the incoming light. It was Edward, the one that was sitting on the cough with a crooked smile on his face. "Edward, I'm glad you're here." Truthfully, I really was glad. If Edward wasn't here, it would take me days to find out my way of here.

"Sorry it took a while love, it was hard to get yourself around Alice's maze." Edward replied calmly, as I sat next to him, enjoying his coolness. A comforted growl came from his chest as he nuzzled against my neck. Suddenly he stopped, cringing back and turned away from me.

"Edward, are you alright?" This was weird, he didn't say anything. He stopped breathing too, even though he doesn't need to breathe. "Edward?" I waved a hand in front of his face. Then, the most unexpected thing happened.  


Edward's head fell off.__

It took my brain a few moments to realize what had just happened. So I did the only thing my brain could think of right then and there.

I screamed.

Carlisle POV  
Am I still at home? It was hard to tell, it's amazing how Alice collapsed the floor and I ended up back in the living room. The night outside was still dark, everything was in place. Except for Esme, she wasn't in costume and she was dry crying. Being compassionate and the love for my wife, I went over to her. Wrapping my arm around her shoulders, I asked her what was wrong. (A/N: It's really a robot Esme and it looks like really bad act trying to cry but Carlisle doesn't realize that, he thinks she's really crying.) There was no reply.

"Esme?" I asked again, she ignored me and continued on to dry sob. I decided to take a look at what she had on the table in front of her. It was a picture… Of me. My thoughts were interrupted as Edward walked down the stairs solemnly. I stood up, trying to catch his attention. "Edward?" He seemed to be avoiding Esme and me, staring at the floor instead. Even when I had screamed at him he still hadn't heard me. Sighing I gave up. 

_Taking slow strides to Esme, Edward mumbled "I'm sorry Esme. There was nothing in Carlisle's office that was left after the Volturi came…"_

What?! What had the Volturi been doing here? "Edward, what happened?!" I was shaking him; he seemed completely unaware of my presence and body that was shaking him furiously.

"What'll we do now… Without Carlisle it seems lost."

"… I-I don't know." Edward growled. "I can't believe Aro had ordered that…"

"… I know." Esme dry sobbed harder.

What? I was dead? NO!! That wasn't possible, I was right here! Is this some kind of sick joke? Suddenly Edward turned to me, smiling. 

"_Just kidding!" Edward laughed, I felt almost humiliated. This was a mean joke. Like in slow motion, everything melted. I mean like seriously, it just melted until it turned to water. Giving a growl of annoyance, I left the room, stomping and slamming the door shut. That was not a joke._

"Do you think we'll get in trouble?" Jasper asked, peering into the whole they had made in the floor. Sure the whole floor was back to normal but while in the process of putting it back together, Jasper had accidentally made a whole in the floorboards.

"For the floor or the maze?" Alice asked, staring intently at Emmett's goldfish as it swam around in its round bowl filled with water.

"Both." 

"_Esme might get mad at the floor and Carlisle might get mad at his and others trick. So yeah, we'll get in trouble." Jasper let out a loud gasp, very audible to vampire ears and the silence. Carlisle's kitty came out of nowhere, licking its paws while staring at Jasper. While Carlisle's kitty clawed at Jasper, Alice opened a small pack of Goldfish: The Snack that Smiles Back. She began to feed it to Emmett's goldfish. Emmett's goldfish stared at the snack for a brief second before chomping on it. Turning back to help Jasper get Carlisle's kitty off of him, Alice could've sworn she heard a small voice saying "Tell Emmett to feed me more often."  
---------------_

_Everyone had met up with everyone in the maze. Each confused, petrified, or very annoyed or in rage. Rosalie was embracing Emmett so hard that you could hear his bones breaking and wouldn't let him go. While Emmett was taking uneasy steps away from Edward. Bella held Edward and looked at his head, examining it and was murmuring questions. Edward answered her questions, but comforting her first. Esme took a few steps at husband while staring at him like he was going to break into a song anytime. On the other hand, Carlisle was trying to reassure her that he wasn't going to sing and it was just a prank by Alice and Jasper. When everyone was calm and normal again, they jumped about twenty feet into the blank air and somehow ended back in the living room. _

"_The house!" Esme cried, causing everyone to stare at what was around them. The whole house was gone. The only remains of it were a darker shade of the grass outside, outlining where the house used to be. Right there, on the grass was a small piece of paper. A letter. From Alice and Jasper. The letter read that they were sorry for the mess and jokes and that the house was abducted by aliens and that they would be in Alaska if anyone needed them. Edward literally ripped the paper to shreds after reading it. _

"_Bella lets go stay with Charlie." Edward said as he stomped to his Volvo with Bella following. _

"_Alaska." Rosalie growled, grabbing Emmett by the arm and hopping into her BMW. _

"_They grow up so fast." Esme said as Carlisle wrapped his arms around her. "Where do we go now?" _

_Carlisle looked down at his wife. "Anywhere you like." She smiled. _

"_Let's go to the movies."_

Vroom vroom.

"Aro, what's that noise?" Jane asked, looking around.

"I- I have no idea." Aro replied, narrowing his eyes. Everyone was here… Wait. One person was missing, it was Caius. "Caius?"

"WRONG!!" A voice shouted and the door of the studio was knocked down. "IT'S ME JASON, HERE TO GET REVENGE. AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" A person, wearing a hockey mask with a chainsaw in hand stepped in the studio. VROOM VROOM. The noise of the chainsaw was very loud. The Volturi could've sworn they had seen bloodstains on the chainsaw.

"Caius, are you demented?!" Alec screamed over the noise. People were screaming and the chainsaw noise, it was very noisy in the small and crowded studio.

"Nah." The chainsaw clicked off and the hockey mask fell off. "Just bored." Just as the camera was about to show what happened to the rest of the Volturi members, it clicked off.

---------------

A/N: Was it good? The chainsaw part was kinda random… Microsoft is still messed up. Sorry if its kinda confusing if it mixes.


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